Brutally honest. Medium spicy. 100% accurate. 🌌💀 If you’ve ever wanted an astrology book that roasts your sun sign while exposing the cosmic chaos of your exes, then The Dirtbag Astrologer by Alberto Toribio is your new favorite read.
With zero sugarcoating, this unapologetically hilarious guide breaks down the zodiac—from Cancer the Simp to Aggro Aries—in ways that will have you laughing, cringing, and questioning your entire existence. Along the way, you'll also get a no-BS explanation of Moon & Rising signs, Houses, Transits, and all the astrology secrets you wish you had known before your last terrible relationship.
📚 What’s Inside?
✔ Brutal & Hysterical Zodiac Sign Breakdowns – No one is safe
✔ Why Your Ex Was a Walking Red Flag (According to Astrology) – We knew it
✔ Moon & Rising Signs Explained Without the Fluff – Hard truths only
✔ Houses, Transits & Cosmic Chaos – Find out how the stars are ruining your life
✔ How to Use Astrology to Improve (or Wreck) Your Life – Choose your path wisely
📏 Book Details:
📖 Format: Hardcover with Printed Laminated Cover
📏 Size: 5 x 7 inches
📑 Pages: 192
✨ A must-have for astrology lovers, skeptics, and anyone who enjoys dark humor – Order your copy today!
